"I'm good enough, "I'm smarter enough, and doggone it, people like me!"
If you don't remember this tagline from Al Franken's character Stuart Smalley on Saturday Night Live, you're probably A- a lot younger than me, or B- had better things to do on a Saturday night during the eighties than watch that show.
It was a clever sketch that poked fun at all of the self-help books and communities out there at the time.
Today, many people swear by affirmations to promote The Power of Positive Thinking ( one of the original self-help books, by the way )
And there are people who roll there eyes at the thought of repeating a phrase or "mantra" to themselves over and over, in the hopes that it will change their lives in some way.
So -
Do affirmations really work?
As a Certified Hypnotist and Instructor who has worked with hundreds of people over the course of my career, and also as someone who spent a lot of time reading those books ( while rolling my eyes) in my twenties and early thirties, I can say this with full conviction-
Yes and No.
When I started the journey oftryingto thinking positively, I read the books that seemed to promise all kinds of wonderful things if I could only start believing the author's own story of how they conquered their depression and apathy and then follow their step by step program for creating success and happiness. Mostly it was about success, though, which naturally meant that happiness would follow.
Naturally.
This was the eighties, after all, where the pursuit of money and padded shouldered suits ruled.
Today, the padded shoulders and giant, permed hair are a thing of the past, but success seems to now be measured by how much you make , how many toys and shoes you own, or how many followers you have on Instagram, Twitter or Facebook.
Affirmations work when it's something that you want to "feel", because your mental and emotional states are something that you can not only control, but can create.
If you want success, affirmations like "I make a million dollars a year, and drive a Bentley" may be what you think you want because its what you've learned represents happiness.
So, if you want that Bentley, but have no job right now, than what might help you to go out and get that first job? How do you want to feel about that?
( Conjuring up cars, jobs, yachts, and cold hard cash with affirmations is more of aSecret thing.
Yes, that book that tells you if you want a parking space, among other things, just think about it and it'll come to you )
Here's how affirmations work.
First, how do you want to feel?
Confident?
Peaceful?
Empowered in any situation?
Less Lonely?
More Creative?
Calm and Relaxed?
Purposeful?
Next, come up with a few phrases or words that state that.
Always make it in the present tense.
Don't use words like "try", "want" or "wish".
For example, "Today I'm going to try and be calm" tells yourself that it's going be a struggle, that it's something you have to reach or try for.
Say it likes it's real, like it's happening right now.
And now, here's the key-
Repetition. Repetition. Repetition.
Stated something once or twice will have no impact on your mind.
Saying it out loud or to yourself ten times a day every day for two weeks will.
Your physical body follows your mind and whatever it feeds it.
My good friend recently told me the story about a guy she worked with at a large insurance firm many years ago, named Joe.
"Every morning when I would see Joe, and ask him how's it going, he would respond, "I'm calm, I'm relaxed and I'm full of energy!" she said.
She would always kind of laugh, thinking he was nice, but a little odd.
"But you know what," she said to me, with a bit of marvel in her voice. "Come to think of it, he was always calm, relaxed and full of energy. Everyone liked being around him. He kept his cool, did a good job, and seemed so happy all of the time."
Joe knew the secret of affirmations.
Today, start thinking about how youwant to feel.
And discover the power of affirmations.
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